adhd problem solving

How to Help Children With ADHD Develop Problem-Solving Skills

Posted on Last updated: September 21, 2023

What’s inside this article: Background information as to why kids with both ADHD and autism struggle with developing problem-solving skills. Strategies you can use to help them develop better problem-solving skills, and board games that help them practice these skills.

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links

We don’t always see it as adults, but kids actually run into a lot of problems. Between arguing with siblings, disagreeing with parents’ rules, school work, balancing fun and responsibility, it’s tougher to be a kid than you think.

It seems there’s always some problem plaguing children. It might seem minor to your, but it isn’t to them. This is why we need to help them develop problem-solving skills .

It’s important for kids to learn how to problem-solve on their own because this is one of those critical life skills that they need.

Problem-Solving Skills & ADHD

Problem-solving skills are an executive function. Executive functions are the more complex functions of the brain.

This matters for children with ADHD because executive dysfunction is a hallmark ADHD symptom. In fact, kids with ADHD are, on average, 30% behind their peers when it comes to executive functioning.

To put that into perspective, if you have an 8-year-old, they probably only have the problem-solving skills of a typical 5-year-old. This becomes an issue because they may already struggle with social skills and now handling conflict with their peers is another challenge.

Spending extra time practicing problem-solving skills and other executive functions can help children with ADHD to develop these important life skills.

Set Realistic Expectations

Adjusting your current expectations, or knowingly setting realistic expectations for your child can help you see that your  child is doing the best that they can.  

As a parent, you can acknowledge this and help your child develop better problem-solving skills.

In the meantime, if your 8-year-old only shows the skill of a 5-year-old when they encounter a problem, you should assume they only currently have the ability of a 5-year-old. Set your expectations to match their current ability.

When your expectations are realistic, your children have more opportunities to be successful. This builds their confidence and helps them thrive.

How to Help Kids Develop Problem-Solving Skills

There are a number of ways you can help children “practice” their problem-solving skills, which over time helps them become more competent.

This involves both games that use their skills and also push them out of their comfort zone a little.

Start with games and situations in which your child will be highly successful. You want to begin by building their confidence so they will be more willing to try solving more challenging problems on their own later.

These strategies are helpful for all children but children with executive dysfunction may need extra time and practice to work on their skills.

Thinking of Possible Solutions

I took a training class on behavior intervention strategies and problem-solving skills were part of the discussion. The instructor said to us:

In order to problem-solve, you need to be able to come up with at least two possible solutions

This statement stuck with me. Kids with ADHD and autism often struggle with cognitive rigidity.

When it comes to problem-solving, cognitive rigidity could look like a child getting “stuck” on the first solution that comes to their head and seeing no other possible way to make a situation work.

For children, that first solution is often impulsive and probably not the best way to handle the situation.

So first of all, find out if your child can think of multiple solutions to issues, either independently or working collaboratively with you.

Start with a brainstorming game. Write a “problem” in a bubble and then ask your child for different ways to handle it and write them down.

After you have a list, see if they can figure out what the “best” way would be to deal with their problem.

Start simple, or even begin with hypothetical problems about their favorite fictional characters.

For example:

In the example above, the most practical solution is to eat something else instead. But if your child gets “stuck” on things they may see no resolution because hotdogs are all that they will eat and will say they won’t eat until you go to the store and buy more.

If they aren’t able to see other possible solutions this may lead to an outburst or meltdown.

Regular practice with this brainstorming activity, especially hypothetical situations where their emotions aren’t involved, will help children to think about multiple solutions to their problems.

Ask Open Ended Questions

When your child is struggling with something, open-ended questions can help them think about things in a different way without you directly intervening and handling their problem for them.

• Can you identify the problem?
• What do you want to do?
• What do you think would happen if you did that?
• How would that make other people feel?
• What other ways might work?

Be that listening ear that your child needs while they work through these big feelings.

Games That Involve Problem-Solving

Strategy and board games often require a higher level of thinking that helps activate the problem-solving region of the brain, known as the prefrontal cortex.

For example, kids may strategically plan a couple of moves ahead in a board game but then need to problem-solve and adjust their strategy after their opponents’ turn.

There are board games for all skill sets and abilities so there’s definitely something out there that is developmentally appropriate for your child and you can work up to more challenging games over time.

Some games you can try include

• Tic Tac Toe
• Think a Link
• Daily Dilemmas Jar

Even though these games don’t include specific problems that your child is facing or may encounter, they still help.

The brain is moldable, so the more you practice using any type of problem-solving, the more connections form in the brain. With practice, this actually improves real-life problem solving too.

The Problem Solving Wheel

The problem-solving wheel is simply a wheel of generic solutions that may help your child solve their problems. This may be helpful if your child struggles to come up with possible solutions because it will prompt them to think about the situation in other ways.

You can use the problem-solving wheel for hypothetical situations, or through role-playing and pretend play scenarios, or as a way to prompt your child to work through their current problems independently .

Do Not Resolve Sibling Conflicts for Them

When siblings start to fight, perhaps over a toy, or which movie to watch, it feels natural as a parent to step in and handle it.

You decide who is right and who is wrong, or you dictate what the fair “compromise” will be. But, every time you intervene and solve this sibling conflict for them you are stealing away an opportunity for them to p ractice their problem-solving skills.

Instead, shift to the role of a mediator and guide them to solve their own problems.

For example, your kids are playing with Play-Doh together and you hear arguing. You look over and see them fighting over the same tool. There are a few ways this scenario plays out.

• You could intervene and say that since no one is getting along then nobody can use the play-doh
• Perhaps you could intervene and dictate which child gets the first turn and which goes next.
• You could reason with them, telling them about all the other cool play-doh tools and hope one of them is enticed to try something different.

Or you can be their mediator.

Just say “I see that you both want to use that play-doh cutter right now and it’s pretty upsetting for both of you… What do you guys think would be a good idea so that everyone is happy playing with the play-doh?”

You would be surprised how often children will willingly suggest fair compromises when prompted instead of being told how to resolve their problems.

The child who would have thrown a fit and stormed away when you dictated they get the second turn will now be offering their brother the item happily.

Make sure you positively reinforce their problem-solving each time they are able to peacefully handle an issue on their own (or with your guidance).

Push Them To Make Choices on Their Own

Children who struggle to make choices also struggle to problem solve. Push your child to make their own choices as often as possible. From the small mundane ones to the somewhat larger choices. They need to be able to do this on their own.

If your child gets overwhelmed making broad decisions then offer options at first. For example, have them pick from two or three choices.

Your child needs to be confident in making their own choices in order to become confident at problem-solving

Let Them Experience The Natural Consequences

The next part of this equation is letting your child experience the natural consequences of their choices. Natural consequences are the inevitable result of your own actions.

If you shield your child from the natural consequence of a bad choice then they will never learn from that decision. The outcome of a poor choice is usually enough to teach your child without you needing to interfere. Just be there for them.

Don’t forget to praise your child for rising to the challenge and learning from their mistakes. Also, emphasize with them ( I know how hard this is) Keep building them up, they need to know that mistakes and failures happen but it’s important to keep going.

More Skills

It’s normal for children with ADHD to require extra time and teaching when it comes to developing social-emotional skills like problem-solving.

Read this list: 38 skills kids need to be successful

You’ll find lots of other skills and teaching tips to help your child develop all the skills they need.

The Take-Away

There are a few key points I hope you took away from this guide.

• Individuals with ADHD are, on average, about 30% behind their peers when it comes to all executive functions , including problem-solving skills.
• You need to set developmentally appropriate expectations.
• Children with ADHD need extra practice and extra time to learn and develop these skills
• Be a mediator that provides guidance instead of taking over and dealing with problems for them.
• Children need to experience the natural consequences of their actions
• Praise your child for trying, even if they aren’t a competent problem-solver yet.

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8 Tips for Living With ADHD as an Adult

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Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental diagnosis that involves issues with attention, executive functioning, hyperactivity, and impulse control. Typically, ADHD symptoms emerge in childhood, but some people go undiagnosed—and untreated—until adulthood.

ADHD may not be diagnosed until later in life if the condition is mild, if it wasn't previously recognized by family members or others, or if it was well-managed until adult demands set in. Regardless of the reason, if you are an adult with ADHD whose symptoms are interfering with your functioning, these tips and strategies may help.

Figure Out What Works For You

Countless books, blogs, and articles have specific and detailed suggestions for living with adult ADHD. Although well-intentioned, these suggestions often require the same executive functioning skills that ADHD interferes with.

People with ADHD are often pressured to stick to schedules and systems that work for neurotypical brains. If you have difficulty sticking to a particular system, it is okay to let go of that expectation.

Notice what tends to work for you, and lean into that. For example, many people keep their keys on a hook by the door so they don't get lost. But people with ADHD might struggle to remember to return their keys to the hook or follow that organizational system .

Instead of choosing the best location for your keys and trying to remember to put them there, notice where you tend to put them naturally. Then, designate that location as the spot where your keys go.

Keep Things Visual

One sign of ADHD is forgetfulness . If something is out of sight, a person with ADHD may not remember it. Visual cues can keep important things at the forefront.

If you need a regular reminder of something, keep it in a basket in a location you pass regularly. Keep a schedule where you can see it. A whiteboard allows you to jot down what you need to remember each day.

Determine Your Optimal Level of Stimulation

Although ADHD is marked by specific symptoms, each person is unique and has different needs. Some people need background noise to focus on a task—though white or brown noise might be more distracting than music, a television show, or a podcast. Others might require silence to maintain focus.

Through trial and error, figure out what works for you. Then, set up your workspace to fit those needs. Remember that your needs might change over time, so be flexible and change your system as needed.

Remember That Your Brain Craves Novelty

ADHD brains process the neurotransmitter dopamine differently than neurotypical brains . Because of this, people living with adult ADHD will often find it easier to focus on things that are new. Regular changes to the environment or workspace can keep the brain engaged.

When you notice that your routine is not holding your attention as it did before, make a small change to keep things interesting and keep your mind engaged. People with ADHD tend to thrive in positions where they do a variety of tasks. This makes teacher, engineer, and small business owner all good jobs for people with ADHD . In these roles, their duties vary so they remain interesting and novel to the ADHD brain.

Practice Self-Compassion

Many people with ADHD also experience anxiety and depression. They often struggle to live up to neurotypical standards and keep neurotypical schedules. Even when these standards are not essential for functioning, society often punishes or ridicules people for diverging from them.

If something works for you and is not harmful, that is okay. Know that you can follow different routines, and that is not a reflection of your value as a human. Practice being kind to yourself and letting go of expectations that do not serve you.

Getting down on yourself for having different needs or brain functioning can be a vicious cycle, making you try harder to force yourself to meet these arbitrary expectations and becoming more upset with yourself when you are unable to do so.

Break Tasks Down

People living with adult ADHD can get overwhelmed by projects or tasks that seem too big or have too many steps. This can cause difficulty with motivation .

When starting a task or project, remember that you do not have to finish it all at once. You can do part of a task and then take a break. For example, if washing the dishes feels like too much, just wash one plate, and then stop. Half done is better than not starting, and it is okay to stop even if you have not finished everything.

If you find that starting the task gives you the energy to keep going, you can wash more. However, take things one step at a time, and give yourself permission to take breaks as needed or stop and start.

Use Alarms and Reminders

People with ADHD might experience meta-forgetfulness, or forgetting that they tend to be forgetful. You might find yourself thinking, “I don’t need to write that down; I will remember it.”

Instead, tell yourself that it is okay that you will not remember it. Now, you can write it down and set a reminder for yourself. People with ADHD also often lose track of time , so frequent cues and reminders can help you stay on track.

You might have to set multiple reminders for different things—since it is easy to dismiss an alarm, and you might forget that you dismissed it. Having several reminders or cues can help you follow through and remember what you are doing.

Try Body Doubling

“ Body doubling ” refers to having another person present while you complete a task. People with ADHD tend to do well with another person present while they work on something as this is a physical cue to remind them of the task and acts as an accountability booster.

Although research is lacking on the benefits of body doubling, some adults with ADHD have reported that this practice helps them stay on task and improve executive functioning. They've found it helpful when doing activities such as studying, doing dishes, and exercising.

There are many ways in which people living with adult ADHD can adjust their schedules and complete tasks. If you find that you're having a hard time staying on task, a mental health professional can help you create solutions that are tailored to your needs.

National Institute of Mental Health. Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder in adults: What you need to know .

Salavert J, Ramos-Quiroga JA, Moreno-Alcázar A, et al. Functional imaging changes in the medial prefrontal cortex in adult ADHD .  J Atten Disord . 2018;22(7):679-693. doi:10.1177/1087054715611492

Zhou R, Wang J, Han X, Ma B, Yuan H, Song Y. Baicalin regulates the dopamine system to control the core symptoms of ADHD .  Mol Brain . 2019;12(1):11. doi:10.1186/s13041-019-0428-5

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD): Data and statistics.

Molavi P, Nadermohammadi M, Salvat Ghojehbeiglou H, Vicario CM, Nitsche MA, Salehinejad MA. ADHD subtype-specific cognitive correlates and association with self-esteem: a quantitative difference .  BMC Psychiatry . 2020;20(1):502. doi:10.1186/s12888-020-02887-4

Brooker RJ, Moore MN, Van Hulle CA, et al. Attentional control explains covariation between symptoms of attention‐deficit/hyperactivity disorder and anxiety during adolescence .  J Res Adolesc . 2020;30(1):126-141. doi:10.1111/jora.12506

Eagle T, Baltaxe-Admony LB, Ringland KE. Proposing body doubling as a continuum of space/time and mutuality: An investigation with neurodivergent participants . Proceedings of the 25th International ACM SIGACCESS Conference on Computers and Accessibility. 2023;85:1-4. doi:10.1145/3597638.3614486

By Amy Marschall, PsyD Dr. Amy Marschall is an autistic clinical psychologist with ADHD, working with children and adolescents who also identify with these neurotypes among others. She is certified in TF-CBT and telemental health.

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10 Surprising Benefits of Having ADHD

People with ADHD have high energy and resilience, among other strengths

• Strengths and Benefits
• ADHD Superpowers
• Medication Benefits
• Balancing Skills and Struggles
• Celebrities and Advocacy
• Next in Adult ADHD Guide How to Focus With ADHD

There are some surprising benefits to being diagnosed with  attention deficit hyperactivity disorder  (ADHD). Strengths, or ADHD "superpowers," include high energy levels and creativity. People with ADHD can also have challenges in life, like difficulty focusing and impulsive behavior.

This article will go over some strengths that people with ADHD may have, as well as the challenges of living with ADHD.

Verywell / Jessica Olah

ADHD Strengths and Benefits 

People with ADHD have  physical characteristics in their brains  that lead to symptoms  of the disorder, including impulsive behavior and trouble paying attention.

However, these characteristics can have benefits, too. For example, even though not being able to sit still (hyperactivity) can be frustrating, research suggests that it also means people living with ADHD have higher energy levels than people who don’t have the condition.

There are other benefits to having ADHD that can touch on many aspects of a person’s life.

Individually

• Energy : A small study found that some people living with ADHD liked having more energy than other people.
• Self-awareness : The treatment for ADHD  often includes therapies that help people learn to manage emotions and behaviors (self-regulation). People with ADHD often learn their triggers and patterns, as well as how to control them. In time, they may become more skilled at self-regulation than some neurotypical people.
• Self-reliance : Some people with ADHD learn how to soothe and regulate themselves (a skill that many neurotypical people can struggle with) as part of their treatment plan.
• Resilience : The ability to bounce back from difficulties (resiliency) is a predictor of success. Many parents and teachers describe kids with ADHD as being resilient.

At Work or School

• Creativity : Creative problem-solving is very important for success at school and work. Research has found that people with ADHD have more creativity and are better at idea generation than people without the disorder. This creativity can lead to outside-the-box thinking that is needed for discovery and innovation.
• Hyperfocus : Many people with ADHD become hyperfocused on things that interest them. This can lead to extreme focus and attention to detail, as well as a passion for school, work projects, and hobbies.
• Risk tolerance : People with ADHD often have a higher risk tolerance than people without the condition. In some situations, this can be beneficial. For example, a person with ADHD might be more empowered to try a solution to a problem.

In Relationships 

• Clear expectations : To cope with symptoms, many people with ADHD have open, honest conversations about expectations with the people they’re close to. This open communication benefits both people and can strengthen the relationship.
• Impulsivity : While there are situations when impulsive behavior can be a downside, qualities like impulsivity and playfulness help keep a spark alive in long-term relationships.
• Receptiveness to therapy and behavioral approaches : Many people living with ADHD are receptive to trying therapies or new approaches, which can be helpful if the relationship they are in encounters challenges.

Are ADHD Superpowers Real?

There’s been a lot of focus on the harmful symptoms of ADHD. There’s less research on ADHD superpowers, but many people with ADHD feel that they are more energetic, creative, courageous, and resilient than people who don’t have the condition.

While more research needs to be done on the benefits of ADHD, focusing on the “superpowers” can help you or your child have a more positive view of life with the condition.

Benefits of ADHD Medication 

About 62% of children with ADHD take medication as part of their treatment plan. Data on ADHD in adults is a little harder to come by, but estimates suggest that of the 4.4% of adults in the United States who have been diagnosed with ADHD, about 4.1% report being treated with medication.

ADHD medications, including stimulants and non-stimulants, can have many benefits. For example, if a person's ADHD symptoms are reduced because they take medication, they might find it easier to focus on and complete tasks at school or work.

People with ADHD who are on medication also have a lower risk for:

• Accidents (including motor vehicle accidents)
• Substance use disorder (addiction)
• Falling behind at school 

That said, medications for ADHD also have side effects and risks, including weight loss and trouble sleeping. Medications for ADHD also aren't right for everyone. Talk to your provider about whether it would be a safe and effective part of your treatment.

The term “ADHD benefits” can also refer to the services and assistance that some people living with ADHD may be able to access. This includes resources like IDEA accommodations in school or SSDI benefits if they are unable to work, for example.

Balancing ADHD Skills and Challenges 

While there are some perks to “ADHD brain,” the negative aspects of living with ADHD are real. People with ADHD learn to strike a balance between managing the symptoms that negatively affect their lives while enjoying the positive effects of having the condition. 

Organizational Hacks

It may take some trial and error, but many people with ADHD find strategies and organizational hacks that help them in life. Therapists can work with people who have ADHD to brainstorm ideas, too.

Simple things like sticking to a schedule, putting essential items like keys in a designated spot, or taking a few minutes to meditate before starting the day can all make a difference for people living with ADHD who have a hard time staying organized.

Mental Health 

People with ADHD are at higher risk for other mental health conditions, including depression and anxiety. If you begin to experience symptoms of depression and anxiety, reach out to a mental health professional who has experience working with people with ADHD.

ADHD Celebrities and Advocacy 

Organizations like CHADD  (Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) offer resources and support for families touched by ADHD.

In addition, many famous people have spoken openly about their challenges and successes navigating life with ADHD, including:

• Olympic gymnast Simone Biles
• Singer-actor Justin Timberlake
• Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps 
• Singer Adam Levine
• Actor Channing Tatum
• Football player Terry Bradshaw
• Singer-songwriter Lily Allen
• Director, screenwriter, and actor Greta Gerwig
• TV personality Ty Pennington
• Foo Fighter’s singer Dave Grohl
• Actor Mark Ruffalo
• Chef Jamie Oliver
• Actress Zooey Deschanel
• Media personality and business owner Paris Hilton
• Dancer Karina Smirnoff
• Astronaut Scott Kelly
• Late-night host of The Daily Show Trevor Noah

Having ADHD  affects many areas of your life . Not all the effects of having ADHD are negative. Increased creativity and energy levels can be positive aspects of having ADHD.

Some people find that managing the negative effects of ADHD through medication helps them enjoy the positive aspects. Learning coping strategies to help with daily tasks like organization is also key for living well with ADHD at any age.

It’s easy to focus on the negative impacts of ADHD, but there are benefits to the condition as well. People with ADHD report being energetic, creative, courageous, and resilient. Learning how to lean into these strengths while controlling symptoms can help you reach your full potential, despite ADHD.

Sedgwick JA, Merwood A, Asherson P. The positive aspects of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder: a qualitative investigation of successful adults with ADHD . ADHD Atten Def Hyp Disord . 2019;11(3):241-253. doi:10.1007/s12402-018-0277-6

Chan ESM, Groves NB, Marsh CL, Miller CE, Richmond KP, Kofler MJ. Are there resilient children with ADHD?   J Atten Disord . 2021;10870547211025629. doi:10.1177/10870547211025629

Boot N, Nevicka B, Baas M. Creativity in ADHD: Goal-directed motivation and domain specificity .  J Atten Disord . 2020;24(13):1857-1866. doi:10.1177/1087054717727352

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Data and statistics about ADHD .

PBS News Hour. A ‘perfect storm’ led to an ADHD medication shortage. Here’s why .

Chang Z, Ghirardi L, Quinn PD, Asherson P, D’Onofrio BM, Larsson H. Risks and benefits of ADHD medication on behavioral and neuropsychiatric outcomes: a qualitative review of pharmacoepidemiology studies using linked prescription databases .  Biol Psychiatry . 2019;86(5):335-343. doi:10.1016/j.biopsych.2019.04.009

KidsHealth. ADHD medicines .

CHADD. Insurance and public benefits .

Department of Education.  About IDEA .

CHADD. Organizing the home and office space .

ADDitude Magazine. Famous people with ADHD .

By Kelly Burch Burch is a New Hampshire-based freelance health writer with a bachelor's degree in communications from Boston University.

Transforming the understanding and treatment of mental illnesses.

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Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder

What is adhd.

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is marked by an ongoing pattern of inattention and/or hyperactivity-impulsivity that interferes with functioning or development. People with ADHD experience an ongoing pattern of the following types of symptoms:

• Inattention means a person may have difficulty staying on task, sustaining focus, and staying organized, and these problems are not due to defiance or lack of comprehension.
• Hyperactivity means a person may seem to move about constantly, including in situations when it is not appropriate, or excessively fidgets, taps, or talks. In adults, hyperactivity may mean extreme restlessness or talking too much.
• Impulsivity means a person may act without thinking or have difficulty with self-control. Impulsivity could also include a desire for immediate rewards or the inability to delay gratification. An impulsive person may interrupt others or make important decisions without considering long-term consequences.

What are the signs and symptoms of ADHD?

Some people with ADHD mainly have symptoms of inattention. Others mostly have symptoms of hyperactivity-impulsivity. Some people have both types of symptoms.

Many people experience some inattention, unfocused motor activity, and impulsivity, but for people with ADHD, these behaviors:

• Are more severe
• Occur more often
• Interfere with or reduce the quality of how they function socially, at school, or in a job

Inattention

People with symptoms of inattention may often:

• Overlook or miss details and make seemingly careless mistakes in schoolwork, at work, or during other activities
• Have difficulty sustaining attention during play or tasks, such as conversations, lectures, or lengthy reading
• Not seem to listen when spoken to directly
• Find it hard to follow through on instructions or finish schoolwork, chores, or duties in the workplace, or may start tasks but lose focus and get easily sidetracked
• Have difficulty organizing tasks and activities, doing tasks in sequence, keeping materials and belongings in order, managing time, and meeting deadlines
• Avoid tasks that require sustained mental effort, such as homework, or for teens and older adults, preparing reports, completing forms, or reviewing lengthy papers
• Lose things necessary for tasks or activities, such as school supplies, pencils, books, tools, wallets, keys, paperwork, eyeglasses, and cell phones
• Be easily distracted by unrelated thoughts or stimuli
• Be forgetful in daily activities, such as chores, errands, returning calls, and keeping appointments

Hyperactivity-impulsivity

People with symptoms of hyperactivity-impulsivity may often:

• Fidget and squirm while seated
• Leave their seats in situations when staying seated is expected, such as in the classroom or the office
• Run, dash around, or climb at inappropriate times or, in teens and adults, often feel restless
• Be unable to play or engage in hobbies quietly
• Be constantly in motion or on the go, or act as if driven by a motor
• Talk excessively
• Answer questions before they are fully asked, finish other people’s sentences, or speak without waiting for a turn in a conversation
• Have difficulty waiting one’s turn
• Interrupt or intrude on others, for example in conversations, games, or activities

Primary care providers sometimes diagnose and treat ADHD. They may also refer individuals to a mental health professional, such as a psychiatrist or clinical psychologist, who can do a thorough evaluation and make an ADHD diagnosis.

For a person to receive a diagnosis of ADHD, the symptoms of inattention and/or hyperactivity-impulsivity must be chronic or long-lasting, impair the person’s functioning, and cause the person to fall behind typical development for their age. Stress, sleep disorders, anxiety, depression, and other physical conditions or illnesses can cause similar symptoms to those of ADHD. Therefore, a thorough evaluation is necessary to determine the cause of the symptoms.

Most children with ADHD receive a diagnosis during the elementary school years. For an adolescent or adult to receive a diagnosis of ADHD, the symptoms need to have been present before age 12.

ADHD symptoms can appear as early as between the ages of 3 and 6 and can continue through adolescence and adulthood. Symptoms of ADHD can be mistaken for emotional or disciplinary problems or missed entirely in children who primarily have symptoms of inattention, leading to a delay in diagnosis. Adults with undiagnosed ADHD may have a history of poor academic performance, problems at work, or difficult or failed relationships.

ADHD symptoms can change over time as a person ages. In young children with ADHD, hyperactivity-impulsivity is the most predominant symptom. As a child reaches elementary school, the symptom of inattention may become more prominent and cause the child to struggle academically. In adolescence, hyperactivity seems to lessen and symptoms may more likely include feelings of restlessness or fidgeting, but inattention and impulsivity may remain. Many adolescents with ADHD also struggle with relationships and antisocial behaviors. Inattention, restlessness, and impulsivity tend to persist into adulthood.

What are the risk factors of ADHD?

Researchers are not sure what causes ADHD, although many studies suggest that genes play a large role. Like many other disorders, ADHD probably results from a combination of factors. In addition to genetics, researchers are looking at possible environmental factors that might raise the risk of developing ADHD and are studying how brain injuries, nutrition, and social environments might play a role in ADHD.

ADHD is more common in males than females, and females with ADHD are more likely to primarily have inattention symptoms. People with ADHD often have other conditions, such as learning disabilities, anxiety disorder, conduct disorder, depression, and substance use disorder.

How is ADHD treated?

While there is no cure for ADHD, currently available treatments may reduce symptoms and improve functioning. Treatments include medication, psychotherapy, education or training, or a combination of treatments.

For many people, ADHD medications reduce hyperactivity and impulsivity and improve their ability to focus, work, and learn. Sometimes several different medications or dosages must be tried before finding the right one that works for a particular person. Anyone taking medications must be monitored closely by their prescribing doctor.

Stimulants. The most common type of medication used for treating ADHD is called a “stimulant.” Although it may seem unusual to treat ADHD with a medication that is considered a stimulant, it works by increasing the brain chemicals dopamine and norepinephrine, which play essential roles in thinking and attention.

Under medical supervision, stimulant medications are considered safe. However, like all medications, they can have side effects, especially when misused or taken in excess of the prescribed dose, and require an individual’s health care provider to monitor how they may be reacting to the medication.

Non-stimulants. A few other ADHD medications are non-stimulants. These medications take longer to start working than stimulants, but can also improve focus, attention, and impulsivity in a person with ADHD. Doctors may prescribe a non-stimulant: when a person has bothersome side effects from stimulants, when a stimulant was not effective, or in combination with a stimulant to increase effectiveness.

Although not approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) specifically for the treatment of ADHD, some antidepressants are used alone or in combination with a stimulant to treat ADHD. Antidepressants may help all of the symptoms of ADHD and can be prescribed if a patient has bothersome side effects from stimulants. Antidepressants can be helpful in combination with stimulants if a patient also has another condition, such as an anxiety disorder, depression, or another mood disorder. Non-stimulant ADHD medications and antidepressants may also have side effects.

Doctors and patients can work together to find the best medication, dose, or medication combination. To find the latest information about medications, talk to a health care provider and visit the FDA website  .

Psychotherapy and psychosocial interventions

Several specific psychosocial interventions have been shown to help individuals with ADHD and their families manage symptoms and improve everyday functioning.

For school-age children, frustration, blame, and anger may have built up within a family before a child is diagnosed. Parents and children may need specialized help to overcome negative feelings. Mental health professionals can educate parents about ADHD and how it affects a family. They also will help the child and his or her parents develop new skills, attitudes, and ways of relating to each other.

All types of therapy for children and teens with ADHD require parents to play an active role. Psychotherapy that includes only individual treatment sessions with the child (without parent involvement) is not effective for managing ADHD symptoms and behavior. This type of treatment is more likely to be effective for treating symptoms of anxiety or depression that may occur along with ADHD.

Behavioral therapy is a type of psychotherapy that aims to help a person change their behavior. It might involve practical assistance, such as help organizing tasks or completing schoolwork, or working through emotionally difficult events. Behavioral therapy also teaches a person how to:

• Monitor their own behavior
• Give oneself praise or rewards for acting in a desired way, such as controlling anger or thinking before acting

Parents, teachers, and family members also can give feedback on certain behaviors and help establish clear rules, chore lists, and structured routines to help a person control their behavior. Therapists may also teach children social skills, such as how to wait their turn, share toys, ask for help, or respond to teasing. Learning to read facial expressions and the tone of voice in others, and how to respond appropriately can also be part of social skills training.

Cognitive behavioral therapy helps a person learn how to be aware and accepting of one’s own thoughts and feelings to improve focus and concentration. The therapist also encourages the person with ADHD to adjust to the life changes that come with treatment, such as thinking before acting, or resisting the urge to take unnecessary risks.

Family and marital therapy can help family members and spouses find productive ways to handle disruptive behaviors, encourage behavior changes, and improve interactions with the person with ADHD.

Parenting skills training (behavioral parent management training) teaches parents skills for encouraging and rewarding positive behaviors in their children. Parents are taught to use a system of rewards and consequences to change a child’s behavior, to give immediate and positive feedback for behaviors they want to encourage, and to ignore or redirect behaviors they want to discourage.

Specific behavioral classroom management interventions and/or academic accommodations for children and teens have been shown to be effective for managing symptoms and improving functioning at school and with peers. Interventions may include behavior management plans or teaching organizational or study skills. Accommodations may include preferential seating in the classroom, reduced classwork load, or extended time on tests and exams. The school may provide accommodations through what is called a 504 Plan or, for children who qualify for special education services, an Individualized Education Plan (IEP). 

To learn more about the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA), visit the  U.S. Department of Education’s IDEA website  .

Stress management techniques can benefit parents of children with ADHD by increasing their ability to deal with frustration so that they can respond calmly to their child’s behavior.

Support groups can help parents and families connect with others who have similar problems and concerns. Groups often meet regularly to share frustrations and successes, to exchange information about recommended specialists and strategies, and to talk with experts.

The National Resource Center on ADHD, a program of Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD®) supported by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), has information and many resources. You can reach this center online   or by phone at 1-866-200-8098.

Learn more about psychotherapy .

Tips to help kids and adults with ADHD stay organized

Parents and teachers can help kids with ADHD stay organized and follow directions with tools such as:

• Keeping a routine and a schedule. Keep the same routine every day, from wake-up time to bedtime. Include times for homework, outdoor play, and indoor activities. Keep the schedule on the refrigerator or a bulletin board. Write changes on the schedule as far in advance as possible.
• Organizing everyday items. Have a place for everything, (such as clothing, backpacks, and toys), and keep everything in its place.
• Using homework and notebook organizers. Use organizers for school material and supplies. Stress to your child the importance of writing down assignments and bringing home necessary books.
• Being clear and consistent. Children with ADHD need consistent rules they can understand and follow.
• Giving praise or rewards when rules are followed. Children with ADHD often receive and expect criticism. Look for good behavior and praise it.

For adults:

A professional counselor or therapist can help an adult with ADHD learn how to organize their life with tools such as:

• Keeping routines.
• Making lists for different tasks and activities.
• Using a calendar for scheduling events.
• Using reminder notes.
• Assigning a special place for keys, bills, and paperwork.
• Breaking down large tasks into more manageable, smaller steps so that completing each part of the task provides a sense of accomplishment.

How can I find a clinical trial for ADHD?

Clinical trials are research studies that look at new ways to prevent, detect, or treat diseases and conditions. The goal of clinical trials is to determine if a new test or treatment works and is safe. Although individuals may benefit from being part of a clinical trial, participants should be aware that the primary purpose of a clinical trial is to gain new scientific knowledge so that others may be better helped in the future.

Researchers at NIMH and around the country conduct many studies with patients and healthy volunteers. We have new and better treatment options today because of what clinical trials uncovered years ago. Be part of tomorrow’s medical breakthroughs. Talk to your health care provider about clinical trials, their benefits and risks, and whether one is right for you.

To learn more or find a study, visit:

• NIMH’s Clinical Trials webpage : Information about participating in clinical trials
• Clinicaltrials.gov: Current Studies on ADHD  : List of clinical trials funded by the National Institutes of Health (NIH) being conducted across the country
• Join a Study: Children - ADHD : List of studies being conducted on the NIH Campus in Bethesda, MD

Where can I learn more about ADHD?

Free brochures and shareable resources.

• Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder: What You Need to Know: This brochure provides information about attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) in children, teens, and adults including symptoms, how it is diagnosed, causes, treatment options, and resources to find help for yourself or your child.
• Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder in Adults: What You Need to Know : This brochure provides information about attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) in adults including symptoms, how ADHD is diagnosed, causes, treatment options, and resources to find help for yourself or someone else. Also available en español .
• Shareable Resources on ADHD : These digital resources, including graphics and messages, can be used to spread the word about ADHD and help promote awareness and education in your community.
• Mental Health Minute: ADHD : Take a mental health minute to learn about ADHD.
• NIMH Expert Discusses Managing ADHD : Learn the signs, symptoms, and treatments of ADHD as well as tips for helping children and adolescents manage ADHD during the pandemic.

Federal resources

• ADHD   : CDC offers fact sheets, infographics, and other resources about the signs, symptoms, and treatment of children with ADHD.
• ADHD   : (MedlinePlus – also available  en español   .)

Research and statistics

• Journal Articles   : This webpage provides information on references and abstracts from MEDLINE/PubMed (National Library of Medicine).
• ADHD Statistics : This web page provides statistics about the prevalence and treatment of ADHD among children, adolescents, and adults.

Last Reviewed: September 2023

Unless otherwise specified, the information on our website and in our publications is in the public domain and may be reused or copied without permission. However, you may not reuse or copy images. Please cite the National Institute of Mental Health as the source. Read our copyright policy to learn more about our guidelines for reusing NIMH content.

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How Does ADHD Impact Problem Solving Abilities?

People usually think of ADHD as a bundle of challenges—like being easily distracted or acting impulsively. However, this condition also shapes unique problem-solving skills that we seldom talk about.

This article takes a deep dive into the relationship between ADHD and problem-solving abilities, we'll explore whether individuals with ADHD possess distinctive problem-solving skills and how these skills manifest. 

By examining aspects such as embracing novelty, hyperfocus, creativity, divergent thinking, adaptability, intuition, and pattern recognition, we aim to uncover the hidden strengths that often accompany ADHD. 

Understanding these capabilities can provide valuable insights into the broader implications of problem-solving for individuals with ADHD, ultimately contributing to a more nuanced perspective on this condition.

Do Individuals with ADHD Have Problem-Solving Skills?

Many ADHD individuals exhibit remarkable creativity, adaptability, and out-of-the-box thinking when confronted with challenges. Their propensity for creative problem-solving allows them to innovate and generate alternative solutions, often approaching problems from novel angles. 

Additionally, their flexibility in adapting to changing circumstances enables them to navigate complex problem spaces with agility, adjusting tactics as needed to overcome obstacles. Despite potential challenges, ADHD individuals often demonstrate resilience and persistence, strictly pursuing solutions even amidst distractions and setbacks. 

How Does ADHD Influence Problem Solving?

When examining how Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) influences problem solving, several distinctive traits emerge, each contributing to a unique approach to tackling challenges.

Embracing Novelty

Individuals with ADHD have a remarkable ability to embrace risk and novelty in problem-solving, but these skills only flourish in the right environment. When placed in a supportive and understanding setting, they are more likely to explore alternative approaches rather than sticking to conventional methods. 

This willingness to venture into uncharted territories fosters a spirit of innovation, allowing them to uncover unconventional solutions that others might miss. By challenging the status quo and embracing unconventional strategies, individuals with ADHD inject a fresh perspective into problem-solving processes, often yielding breakthrough outcomes that defy conventional expectations.

ADHDers experience moments of hyperfocus, where they show intense concentration on tasks that interest them. A supportive environment allows them to deeply engage in problem-solving with unmatched dedication and creativity. Despite distractions, they stay focused, exploring complex problems with a precision that others might lack. 

However, in the wrong environment, these skills may not appear. The right setting helps them sustain their intense focus, especially on tasks they are passionate about . This enables them to achieve impressive problem-solving results, often surpassing expectations and challenging common stereotypes about ADHD.

Creativity and Divergent Thinking

Individuals with ADHD are known for their high creativity and ability to think differently. This flexibility helps them come up with many ideas and perspectives when facing complex problems. Unlike neurotypical individuals, who may stick to conventional thinking, those with ADHD can embrace unusual viewpoints. 

In a supportive environment, they explore various possibilities and consider alternative perspectives, adding fresh insights and innovative solutions to problem-solving. This propensity for divergent thinking not only enhances the quality of problem-solving outcomes but also fosters a culture of creativity and innovation within collaborative settings.

Adaptability

Adaptability is a key strength in ADHD problem-solving, as individuals seamlessly adapt to changing circumstances and navigate dynamic problem-solving scenarios with ease. This innate adaptability enables them to pivot quickly and adjust their strategies in response to evolving challenges, creating resilience in the face of adversity. 

Whether confronted with unexpected obstacles or shifting priorities, individuals with ADHD demonstrate a remarkable ability to remain agile and resourceful in the right environment, persevering until a solution is found. By embracing change and embracing flexibility, they effectively navigate the complexities of problem-solving processes, ultimately achieving successful outcomes even in the most challenging of circumstances.

Intuition and Pattern Recognition

Many individuals with ADHD possess keen intuition and pattern recognition abilities , allowing them to discern underlying patterns within seemingly disparate information. This intuitive insight enables them to swiftly identify connections and trends that inform their approach to resolving challenges. 

By leveraging their innate capacity for pattern recognition, they streamline problem-solving processes, identifying efficient pathways to successful outcomes. This intuitive understanding of underlying patterns not only enhances the efficiency of problem-solving endeavors but also empowers individuals with ADHD to approach challenges with confidence and clarity, ultimately achieving meaningful and sustainable solutions.

What Does Problem Solving Mean for Individuals with ADHD? 

Harnessing the inherent strengths of ADHD can unlock a wealth of opportunities across various domains of life. From academia to the workplace, individuals with ADHD possess unique qualities that empower them to thrive in diverse environments.

• Academic Excellence : In academia, ADHD individuals can leverage their creativity and unconventional thinking to excel in subjects that demand innovative problem-solving, such as the arts, sciences, and entrepreneurship. In a supportive environment, their ability to think outside the box allows them to approach academic challenges with a fresh perspective, leading to breakthrough insights and discoveries. ‍
• Career Advancement : In the career realm, ADHD individuals' adaptability and resilience make them well-suited for dynamic environments that require quick thinking and agile problem-solving. Roles in sales, marketing, and project management capitalize on their ability to navigate complex challenges with confidence and creativity, enabling them to achieve success and advancement in their chosen fields. ‍
• Entrepreneurial Ventures : The entrepreneurial landscape is ripe for individuals with ADHD, as their creativity, risk tolerance, and unconventional thinking make them well-suited for innovation and problem-solving in business ventures. Their ability to envision new possibilities and adapt quickly to changing market dynamics positions them as formidable entrepreneurs, but support structures help them navigate challenges and market changes effectively. ‍
• Arts and Creative Fields : In artistic and creative fields, ADHD individuals often excel, leveraging their boundless imagination and propensity for divergent thinking to produce groundbreaking works of art, literature, and music. A supportive environment enables them to channel their creativity effectively and manage their workflow. Their ability to see the world through a different lens enables them to create original and compelling content that resonates with audiences on a profound level. ‍
• Leadership Roles : Despite common misconceptions, ADHD individuals possess natural leadership qualities that can be invaluable in managerial and executive roles. Their ability to think on their feet, delegate tasks effectively, and inspire others with their passion and enthusiasm make them dynamic leaders who can motivate teams to achieve exceptional results. However, accommodations like clear communication channels and strategies for time management are vital for them to effectively lead teams and inspire exceptional results. ‍
• Workplace Contribution : Additionally, in the workplace, ADHD individuals can contribute valuable insights and perspectives to collaborative problem-solving initiatives. Their intuitive understanding of patterns and willingness to explore novel solutions enriches team dynamics, fostering a culture of innovation and driving organizational growth. But, accommodations such as task breakdowns and regular feedback sessions are necessary to support their contributions and foster a culture of innovation.

FAQs in Relation to ADHD and Problem Solving

Are there specific problem-solving skills that individuals with adhd excel in.

Individuals with ADHD often excel in creative problem-solving, quick thinking, and adaptability. They may come up with original ideas and solutions that others might not consider.

How can individuals with ADHD enhance their problem-solving skills?

Enhancing problem-solving skills can involve strategies like breaking tasks into smaller steps, using tools like timers and planners for better time management, and creating structured environments that minimize distractions.

What are the challenges faced by individuals with ADHD in problem-solving situations?

Common challenges include maintaining attention on a single task, avoiding impulsive decisions, and managing time effectively. These issues can make traditional problem-solving more difficult but can be mitigated with specific strategies and support.

Final Thoughts

ADHD is not a deficit; it's a different way of thinking. By understanding the unique problem-solving strengths associated with ADHD and implementing strategies to address the challenges, individuals with ADHD can become creative powerhouses, tackling problems with fresh perspectives and innovative solutions.  

By cultivating supportive environments that celebrate the strengths of neurodiversity , we can all tap into the vast potential of those with ADHD, driving progress and innovation across all fields.

To start your journey towards understanding yourself better and thriving with ADHD, get Focus Bear , a productivity app geared towards helping individuals with ADHD.

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Learn to Rewire Your ADHD Brain to Improve Cognitive Skills

How neuroplasticity helps to improve adhd symptoms..

Posted May 13, 2024 | Reviewed by Monica Vilhauer

• What Is ADHD?
• Take our ADHD Test
• Find a therapist to help with ADHD
• Neuroplasticity is when the brain can rewire itself based on our daily experiences.
• Novel environments can improve executive function skills in individuals with ADHD.
• Exercise, artistic expression, and even playing video games can boost cognitive functioning.

My ADHD son loves to play puzzle-based video games. They are challenging, require problem-solving, and navigating novel environments. While my son enjoys playing these games, they are secretly improving his cognitive abilities and how his brain works. This is due to neuroplasticity—how our brains change in response to our environment and daily experiences.

Neuroplasticity and ADHD

Neuroplasticity is at work in your child when they learn a new concept in school, learn to ride a bike, or play an instrument. In recent years, research has focused on the benefit of neuroplasticity in improving executive function skills in children and adults with ADHD. When a cognitive training program, including planning, attention, memory , and problem-solving was assessed daily in ADHD children over a two-week period, volumetric increases in gray matter (neuronal cell bodies) were observed in brain areas commonly associated with ADHD. In other words, it’s possible that “brain training” can lead to an improvement in the executive function deficits prevalent in ADHD.

Summer vacation, when your child is away from the stressors of school, may be a good time to practice some skills to help your child rewire their ADHD brain for success.

Get outdoors and explore

My son has a self-balancing electric skateboard, and he had to learn to navigate alternate routes to the busy streets around his college campus. Exploring a new environment can enhance cognitive functioning through problem-solving, planning, and memory.

• Consider having your child find a new route to a friend’s house, whether by walking, biking, or driving.
• Visit a park and explore hiking trails or waterways.
• Another way to “explore” is by trying to do things with your non-dominant hand.

Practice balancing and get some exercise

Within the past two decades, scientists have realized a connection between the cerebellum and other higher functioning brain regions (e.g. prefrontal cortex) responsible for cognitive functions like learning and memory. The cerebellum has a large concentration of dopamine neurons and is primarily responsible for motor control. Based on connections between the cerebellum and the prefrontal cortex, strengthening the cerebellum through balance exercises has been shown to improve executive function skills. ADHD experts Drs. Edward Hallowell and John Ratey suggest doing simple balance exercises like these:

• Standing on one leg for a minute, or until you fall over
• Standing on one leg for a minute with your eyes closed, or until you fall over
• Taking your socks off and putting them on without sitting
• Learning to juggle, then spending 3-5 minutes juggling

Other activities like martial arts, skiing and skateboarding (all activities my son likes to do) are also good for practicing balance.

According to Dr. Ratey, exercise can help regulate emotional control and fidgetiness, and increase attention. More complicated exercises, such as martial arts, gymnastics, or mountain biking, have the greatest effect on improving focus and concentration, since you need to learn the skills for these technical and challenging activities (e.g. you don’t want to fall off your bicycle while riding on dangerous terrain).

Get creative

Diffuse attention contributes to highly creative ADHD brains. Research studies suggest children with ADHD may be better at music and art. For my son, there was mandatory participation in either band or choir beginning in elementary school, and he chose to play the trumpet and stuck with it through high school (he also played piano). Music and art can help with important executive function skills like concentration, focus, memory, motor coordination (cerebellum-prefrontal cortex link), expressing emotions, and communicating.

• Have your child dust off their instrument during summer break and encourage them to learn a new song. It may be fun for them to choose a favorite tune.
• If your child loves to draw or paint, creating an art piece can help with brain plasticity.

Play video games

If you are like me then you spend an exorbitant amount of time trying to get your ADHD child to STOP playing video games. However, playing video games can help teach your brain new skills through focus, problem-solving, navigating challenging situations, recovering from failure ( emotional regulation ), and motor coordination (cerebellum-prefrontal cortex link). The FDA has even approved a video game for the treatment of ADHD. Compliance won’t be an issue since most kids love gaming, just like my son who I am sure I would find playing one of his puzzle games if I went up to his bedroom. Just be sure to monitor playing time so there’s time left in the day to increase neuroplasticity in other ways too!

Hoekzema E, Carmona S, Ramos-Quiroga JA, Barba E, Bielsa A, Tremols V, Rovira M, Soliva JC, Casas M, Bulbena A, Tobeña A, Vilarroya O. Training-induced neuroanatomical plasticity in ADHD: a tensor-based morphometric study. Hum Brain Mapp. 2011 Oct;32(10):1741-9.

Hallowell, E. & Ratey, J. (2021). ADHD 2.0: New science and essential strategies for thriving with distraction—from childhood through adulthood. New York, NY: Ballantine Books.

Rapoport, J., Gogtay, N. Brain Neuroplasticity in Healthy, Hyperactive and Psychotic Children: Insights from Neuroimaging. Neuropsychopharmacol 33, 181–197 (2008).

Ratey, J.J., & Hagerman, E. (2013). Spark: The revolutionary new science of exercise and the brain . Little, Brown.

Rawson, K. (n.d.) Balance Exercises: An Alternative Treatment for ADHD. Coachbit. https://coachbit.com/cb-parents/balance-exercises-an-alternative-treatm… .

Raypole, C. (2020, June 17). 6 Ways to Rewire Your Brain. Healthline https://www.healthline.com/health/rewiring-your-brain .

Kristin Wilcox, Ph.D. , is the author of Andrew's Awesome Adventures with His ADHD Brain . She has studied ADHD medications and drug abuse behavior at Emory University and Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine.

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An ADHD diagnosis in adulthood comes with challenges and benefits

For adults, undiagnosed ADHD symptoms can lead to chronic stress and low self-esteem

Vol. 54 No. 2 Print version: page 52

• Perception and Attention

When Terry Matlen, a clinical social worker, was in her 40s, she was diagnosed with ADHD. “My entire life, there was something off,” Matlen said. This included significant anxiety as well as academic and behavioral issues, all of which started at a young age. Although Matlen was initially quite skeptical of her diagnosis, going so far as to seek out a second and third opinion, she eventually came to accept that she had ADHD.

“This makes sense now. I can’t concentrate; I can’t finish projects; my house is a disaster; I can’t get dinner on the table,” Matlen said. “Anxiety doesn’t explain the extent of my disorganization.”

Matlen was diagnosed in the mid-1990s, when many specialists still didn’t understand what ADHD looked like in either girls or adults. Matlen didn’t look like the stereotypical little boy who couldn’t sit still. Although she struggled a lot with her symptoms, which included being unable to pay attention in class or stay organized, no one recognized that the underlying issue was undiagnosed ADHD.

ADHD has three subtypes, which include hyperactive ­impulsive, primarily inattentive, and combined. With inattentive type, the restlessness is internal. “A lot of kids with inattentive ADHD get overlooked,” said Peter Jaksa, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in treating ADHD. “The behavioral problems get more attention.” For many with inattentive ADHD, they are the ones daydreaming in class rather than paying attention. However, since they aren’t being disruptive, their symptoms can easily go unnoticed.

This is especially true with women and girls, as ADHD is more often diagnosed and treated in males than females, due to differences in how symptoms look ( Skogli, E. W., et al., BMC Psychiatry , Vol. 13, 2013 ). As a number of studies show, untreated ADHD leads to adverse effects on long-term academic performance ( Arnold, L. E., et al., Journal of Attention Disorders , Vol. 24, No. 1, 2015 ). In addition, a number of studies show that those with untreated ADHD fare worse than those with treated ADHD or no ADHD ( Harpin, V., et al., Journal of Attention Disorders , Vol. 20, No. 4, 2013 ).

The process of diagnosing adults

For symptoms to be considered ADHD, they must have started before the age of 12. This makes diagnosing adults more complicated, as the process requires creating a timeline of when symptoms first appeared. In addition to talking with his patient, Jaksa finds that it can be helpful to look at old report cards, where comments such as “Struggles to pay attention during class,” “Often forgets homework at home,” or “Isn’t living up to potential” can help give him a sense of when symptoms started appearing.

“We have a much longer history to look at,” he said. “The best diagnostic indicator for ADHD is not test scores; it’s history.” For the diagnostic process, Jaksa conducts a very structured interview—one that delves into their social, emotional, and academic history. If possible, he interviews a family member who can provide perspective on childhood behaviors.

Jaksa said adults often have comorbidities, such as anxiety and depression. With these comorbidities, untreated ADHD can either cause them or make them worse. “When ADHD is not diagnosed—when it’s not treated effectively—over time, chronic stress and frustration lead to anxiety,” Jaksa said. “This has a very negative impact on self-esteem. It’s very common to see adults with ADHD grow up with a strong sense of underachievement.” Continually hearing messages like “try harder” or “you should be doing better,” can get internalized and lead to anxiety and/or depression, Jaksa said.

In some patients, providers may recognize signs right away, such as tardiness, forgetting valuable personal items, or fidgeting while in the waiting room. Although no one symptom can be definitive, all of this added up can paint a picture of what the symptoms look like, how long they have been going on, and the degree of functional impairment. “My mind is shifting constantly,” said Lisa Green, an oncology nurse who was diagnosed with ADHD in her 40s.

It also helps the diagnosis if there is a family history of ADHD, as it is a highly heritable disorder. For Matlen, the process of seeking a diagnosis for her younger daughter was when she realized that she also had the disorder. “It’s pretty well established that ADHD is about 70% to 80% heritable,” said Eugene Arnold, a professor emeritus at The Ohio State University whose research focuses on ADHD.

Difficulties with diagnosing

One of the challenging aspects of diagnosing an adult is the presence of other comorbidities, some of which can mimic ADHD symptoms. These comorbidities can either be due to a separate disorder or be caused by the ADHD. For many people with ADHD, Matlen included, the lack of early treatment, combined with symptoms of ADHD, can lead to developing mood disorders such as anxiety and depression. If their underlying ADHD is not diagnosed and treated, treatment for their other comorbidities is often ineffective. ( Ginsberg, Y., et al., Primary Care Companion for CNS Disorders , Vol. 16, No. 3, 2014 ). “My anxiety is triggered a lot by being disorganized, by not being prepared, by being constantly overwhelmed,” Matlen said.

There’s also an overlap between ADHD and autism spectrum disorder (ASD). “About half of people with autism also have ADHD,” Arnold said. With ADHD being more common than ASD, the reverse is not true—with a lower proportion of people with ADHD also having ASD.

Jon Stevens, MD, a psychiatrist based in Houston, compares the onset of symptoms as being like layers of an onion: The deepest layer is developmental disorders, such as autism; the second deepest layer is ADHD, for which the symptoms can be observed quite early, followed by mood disorders such as anxiety and depression, which can develop as early as middle or high school. Finally, the outermost layer is schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, which tend to emerge during college years or a little later.

“These conditions, in my experience, develop inside out,” Stevens said. Symptoms of developmental disorders such as autism show up the earliest, while ADHD symptoms will show up a little later. Some of the more noticeable symptoms, such as hyperactivity, parents will start noticing early on, while other symptoms, such as inattentiveness, will start becoming more noticeable once children start school.

Another major difference is the persistence of symptoms. “If you think about anxiety and depression, those disorders and the symptoms that flow from them, tend to be more situational and more cyclic,” said Will Canu, PhD, a professor of psychology at Appalachian State University. With a disorder like ADHD, the symptoms are always there, with the caveat that they can be exacerbated under certain conditions, such as during times of stress or from anxiety or depression.

The effect of Covid -19 on adults with ADHD

The Covid -19 pandemic was particularly hard on those with ADHD because of the disruption in routine. Routines are important for people with ADHD, as they can help with executive functioning issues, such as staying organized and staying on track. However, developing and maintaining these routines is harder, which means that major changes in working and home life have been particularly hard to navigate.

[ Related:   Helping adults and children with ADHD in a pandemic world ]

In Stevens’ clinical practice, he has seen patients cope with stress from the pandemic in a number of ways. For adults who were actively receiving treatment, the shift to working from home offered some benefits. “Provided they kept taking their medication, they generally fared well,” he said. “A lot of my patients found [working from home] more helpful, because there were fewer distractions of the water cooler chatter or someone coming to your cubicle.” The big exception was if patients started self-medicating with alcohol or other substances.

Constant upheaval, combined with childcare disruptions, created extremely difficult conditions for women with undiagnosed ADHD and young children, Canu said. In addition to major disruptions in routines, the unpredictability of school and daycare closures has been particularly challenging for parents with young children.

The advantage of diagnosis and treatment

For many patients whose symptoms were overlooked during their early years, diagnosis can be both life changing, and bittersweet. In a 2020 study, researchers compared 444 adults with diagnosed ADHD with 1,055 adults who exhibited symptoms but had no formal diagnosis. After matching for age and gender, those with a diagnosis reported a higher quality of life, which included metrics for work productivity, self-esteem, and functional performance ( Pawaskar, M., et al., Journal of Attention Disorders , Vol. 24, No. 1, 2020 ).

Canu said being diagnosed helps people understand themselves better, which includes gaining perspective on the reasons for some of their struggles. “That can change the way they feel about themselves, which can cascade into a lot of positive things,” Canu said.

Treatments include behavioral strategies for managing their symptoms, for which working with an expert, such as a psychologist who is experienced in treating patients with ADHD, can be invaluable. This includes cognitive behavioral therapy for ADHD, which focuses on managing executive functioning difficulties such as time management, organizational skills, impulse control, and emotional self-regulation.

When necessary, medication can also help manage symptoms. For psychologists who do not have prescribing privileges, this can mean working in concert with integrated care teams, primary-care providers, or psychiatrists. For many patients, their most effective treatment regimen is a combination of behavioral strategies and medication. “With that in place, if it’s effective, they’re able to function better,” Canu said.

In a 2014 study, 250 previously nonmedicated adults who received the ADHD medication methylphenidate for the first time were followed for a full year, with those patients who either couldn’t tolerate or didn’t experience relief in symptoms switched to either an alternate stimulant medication or the nonstimulant medication atomoxetine. Compared with their peers who discontinued medication, those who were still on medication had reduced severity of symptoms ( Fredriksen, M., et al., European Neuropsychopharmacology , Vol. 24, No. 12, 2014 ). “Medication slows me down enough to breathe and to think,” Green said.

Dealing with late-life diagnosis

Receiving a diagnosis as an adult can often bring up some complicated emotions, whether it’s grief over lost opportunities, relief at finally understanding certain struggles, or anger over symptoms having been overlooked for so long. For Matlen, she felt an overwhelming sense of relief. “There was a concrete explanation,” she said.

For others, receiving a diagnosis later in life can lead to regrets about lost opportunities, whether it was failing out of school, struggling to establish a career, or experiencing relationship issues because of their ADHD symptoms going overlooked and untreated. “There is a lot of grief work that needs to be done to help work through the many years of struggling and not knowing why,” Matlen said. However, in her experience, “Once all those parts and pieces are looked at with this new understanding, people really take off, in a good way,” she said. Often, therapy is an important component of thriving after a diagnosis.

For Matlen, in addition to gaining a better understanding of why she was struggling so much, receiving a diagnosis and treatment changed her entire life. It ended up being the missing piece that helped ease her anxiety. Once she had a diagnosis and started treatment, her issues with anxiety started improving in a way that years of therapy and antianxiety medication had never been able to accomplish.

Given how life-changing her diagnosis was, combined with the lack of information and resources available, especially for women, Matlen ultimately made a career switch, combining her own experience of growing up with undiagnosed ADHD with her background as a clinical social worker. She went on to write the books The Queen of Distraction and Survival Tips for Women With AD/HD . She also founded a Facebook group for women with ADHD, which now has over 36,000 members, and she often consults with specialists on the realities of living with ADHD.

Now, almost 30 years after her initial diagnosis, Matlen still hasn’t seen nearly as much progress in the field as she had hoped, especially for girls and women. “I see the same stories even now,” she said.

Further reading

Meta-analysis of cognitive–behavioral treatments for adult ADHD Knouse, L. E., et al., Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology , 2017

Association between psychiatric symptoms and executive function in adults with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder Arellano-Virto, P. T., et al., Psychology & Neuroscience , 2021

The ADHD Symptom Infrequency Scale (ASIS): A novel measure designed to detect adult ADHD simulators Courrégé, S. C., et al., Psychological Assessment , 2019

A randomized controlled trial examining CBT for college students with ADHD Anastopoulos, A. D., et al., Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology , 2021

Succeeding With Adult ADHD: Daily Strategies to Help You Achieve Your Goals and Manage Your Life Levrini, A., APA LifeTools Series, 2023

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Problems Solved!

Adhd parenting tips for helping your child learn problem-solving skills that will help her achieve success at school and at home..

It’s no secret that impulsivity is a key ADHD trait.

For children with attention deficit, this may bring more than its fair share of challenges, from acting on impulse to repeating the same problems over and over. It also makes it more difficult to overcome challenges .

A child with ADHD may rush into grappling with a problem without thinking it through, and it’s our job as parents to help them break this habit.

Instill Self-Reliance

Methodical problem-solving doesn’t come naturally to children with ADHD, but it can be taught. And learning to tackle challenges on his own, using solutions he came up with, will boost your child’s self-esteem .

Here’s how three parents built their children’s problem-solving skills while meeting three tough challenges:

[ Free Resource: Great Activities for Kids with ADHD ]

#1: Jill and her mom had nightly fights over homework.

At the end of a rough week, Jill’s mom sat down with her daughter. She asked, “What can we do about the homework battles that make us both unhappy?”

Jill told her mom she felt “bottled up inside” when she came home. They brainstormed a few solutions. Jill proposed walking the dog before starting homework, or having her mom help her prioritize her assignments. Mom suggested setting a timer — and racing to beat it — while working on each subject. She also offered to fix a healthy snack, “for munching between tasks.”

After discussing, and discarding, many ideas, Mom asked, “Which solution do you want to try first? It’s OK if it doesn’t work. We can try a different idea next week.”

Jill decided to have her mom help her arrange her work on the dining-room table. The next week went much better. When her mom asked, “How do you think your plan worked?” Jill gave herself credit for being a good problem-solver. They also decided to add the munchies.

[ Never Punish a Child for Behavior Outside His Control ]

#2: Karen was sad because no one wanted to play with her at recess.

Her mom and dad decided to hold a family meeting, to solicit suggestions. Sam, her big brother, said, “Karen always asks her friends to play her game.” They developed a list of ideas. Karen decided to invite two girls over for a play date , but didn’t think the idea was successful. “I still can’t get them to play what I pick,” she said.

Next, Karen decided to try joining in whatever activity other girls were already playing at recess. At that week’s family meeting, Karen smiled and said, “It’s more fun to try new games than I thought it would be.” Karen’s parents told her she should be proud of herself for finding a solution.

#3: Robert was always yelling at his little sister.

Each outburst left her feeling hurt and Robert feeling guilty. One evening, Robert and his dad sat down to talk about it. “I think your sister wants your attention. When she can’t have it, she does things to annoy you, and you respond by yelling,” said Dad.

Armed with this insight, Robert came up with ideas. “Let’s lock her in her room,” he suggested. Dad didn’t think that would be fair. Finally, Robert came up with a plan: “I will tell Sara that I will play with her after school for 20 minutes. If she doesn’t bug me, I’ll add five minutes. If she bugs me before our playtime, I’ll take away five minutes.”

At first, Robert’s sister lost playtime, but after a few days, she began to earn extra minutes. Robert invited Sara to join in the evaluation session, and she said she liked the time they spent together. “I guess we won’t have to try the ‘lock up’ idea,” he said with a smile.

[ Positive Charge: How to Reinforce Good Behavior ]

Impulsivity & Hyperactivity: Read These Next

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Adult attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a mental health disorder that includes a combination of persistent problems, such as difficulty paying attention, hyperactivity and impulsive behavior. Adult ADHD can lead to unstable relationships, poor work or school performance, low self-esteem, and other problems.

Though it's called adult ADHD , symptoms start in early childhood and continue into adulthood. In some cases, ADHD is not recognized or diagnosed until the person is an adult. Adult ADHD symptoms may not be as clear as ADHD symptoms in children. In adults, hyperactivity may decrease, but struggles with impulsiveness, restlessness and difficulty paying attention may continue.

Treatment for adult ADHD is similar to treatment for childhood ADHD . Adult ADHD treatment includes medications, psychological counseling (psychotherapy) and treatment for any mental health conditions that occur along with ADHD .

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Some people with ADHD have fewer symptoms as they age, but some adults continue to have major symptoms that interfere with daily functioning. In adults, the main features of ADHD may include difficulty paying attention, impulsiveness and restlessness. Symptoms can range from mild to severe.

Many adults with ADHD aren't aware they have it — they just know that everyday tasks can be a challenge. Adults with ADHD may find it difficult to focus and prioritize, leading to missed deadlines and forgotten meetings or social plans. The inability to control impulses can range from impatience waiting in line or driving in traffic to mood swings and outbursts of anger.

Adult ADHD symptoms may include:

• Impulsiveness
• Disorganization and problems prioritizing
• Poor time management skills
• Problems focusing on a task
• Trouble multitasking
• Excessive activity or restlessness
• Poor planning
• Low frustration tolerance
• Frequent mood swings
• Problems following through and completing tasks
• Trouble coping with stress

What's typical behavior and what's ADHD?

Almost everyone has some symptoms similar to ADHD at some point in their lives. If your difficulties are recent or occurred only occasionally in the past, you probably don't have ADHD . ADHD is diagnosed only when symptoms are severe enough to cause ongoing problems in more than one area of your life. These persistent and disruptive symptoms can be traced back to early childhood.

Diagnosis of ADHD in adults can be difficult because certain ADHD symptoms are similar to those caused by other conditions, such as anxiety or mood disorders. And many adults with ADHD also have at least one other mental health condition, such as depression or anxiety.

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If any of the symptoms listed above continually disrupt your life, talk to your doctor about whether you might have ADHD .

Different types of health care professionals may diagnose and supervise treatment for ADHD . Seek a provider who has training and experience in caring for adults with ADHD .

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While the exact cause of ADHD is not clear, research efforts continue. Factors that may be involved in the development of ADHD include:

• Genetics. ADHD can run in families, and studies indicate that genes may play a role.
• Environment. Certain environmental factors also may increase risk, such as lead exposure as a child.
• Problems during development. Problems with the central nervous system at key moments in development may play a role.

Risk factors

Risk of ADHD may increase if:

• You have blood relatives, such as a parent or sibling, with ADHD or another mental health disorder
• Your mother smoked, drank alcohol or used drugs during pregnancy
• As a child, you were exposed to environmental toxins — such as lead, found mainly in paint and pipes in older buildings
• You were born prematurely

Complications

ADHD can make life difficult for you. ADHD has been linked to:

• Poor school or work performance
• Unemployment
• Financial problems
• Trouble with the law
• Alcohol or other substance misuse
• Frequent car accidents or other accidents
• Unstable relationships
• Poor physical and mental health
• Poor self-image
• Suicide attempts

Coexisting conditions

Although ADHD doesn't cause other psychological or developmental problems, other disorders often occur along with ADHD and make treatment more challenging. These include:

• Mood disorders. Many adults with ADHD also have depression, bipolar disorder or another mood disorder. While mood problems aren't necessarily due directly to ADHD , a repeated pattern of failures and frustrations due to ADHD can worsen depression.
• Anxiety disorders. Anxiety disorders occur fairly often in adults with ADHD . Anxiety disorders may cause overwhelming worry, nervousness and other symptoms. Anxiety can be made worse by the challenges and setbacks caused by ADHD .
• Other psychiatric disorders. Adults with ADHD are at increased risk of other psychiatric disorders, such as personality disorders, intermittent explosive disorder and substance use disorders.
• Learning disabilities. Adults with ADHD may score lower on academic testing than would be expected for their age, intelligence and education. Learning disabilities can include problems with understanding and communicating.
• Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. In: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders DSM-5. 5th ed. Arlington, Va.: American Psychiatric Association; 2013. https://dsm.psychiatryonline.org. Accessed Jan. 26, 2019.
• Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. National Institute of Mental Health. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder-adhd/index.shtml. Accessed Jan. 26, 2019.
• AskMayoExpert. Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. Rochester, Minn.: Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research; 2017.
• What is ADHD? American Psychiatric Association. https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/adhd/what-is-adhd. Accessed Jan. 26, 2019.
• ADHD. National Alliance on Mental Illness. https://www.nami.org/Learn-More/Mental-Health-Conditions/ADHD/Overview. Accessed Jan. 26, 2019.
• Adult ADHD (attention deficit hyperactive disorder). Anxiety and Depression Association of America. https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/related-illnesses/other-related-conditions/adult-adhd. Accessed Feb. 11, 2019.
• Geffen J, et al. Treatment of adult ADHD: A clinical perspective. Therapeutic Advances in Psychopharmacology. 2018;8:25.
• Adult ADHD. American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. https://www.aamft.org/Consumer_Updates/Adult_ADHD.aspx. Accessed Feb. 11, 2019.
• Kooij JJS, et al. Updated European consensus statement on diagnosis and treatment of adult ADHD. European Psychiatry. 2019;56:14.
• Fields SA, et al. Adult ADHD: Addressing a unique set of challenges. Journal of Family Practice. 2017;66:68.
• Mitchell JT, et al. Mindfulness meditation training for attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder in adulthood: Current empirical support, treatment overview, and future direction. Cognitive and Behavioral Practice. 2015;22:172.
• Bhagia J (expert opinion). Mayo Clinic, Rochester, Minn. June 13, 2019.
• Hyperthyroidism (overactive). American Thyroid Association. https://www.thyroid.org/hyperthyroidism/. Accessed June 13, 2019.
• Low blood glucose (hypoglycemia). National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases. https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/diabetes/overview/preventing-problems/low-blood-glucose-hypoglycemia. Accessed June 13, 2019.

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12 Things Not To Say To Someone Who Has ADHD

Parenting reporter

There has been a surge in adult ADHD diagnoses in recent years, so it’s not surprising if you’re starting to feel like everyone you know suddenly has the condition.

Dr. Ryan Sultan , a psychiatrist at New York-Presbyterian hospital, explained that there are a number of reasons for the uptick. First, there has been an increase in recognition and awareness of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder symptoms, including those that don’t fit the stereotypical profile of a child who can’t stay in his seat at school. We now know that ADHD can present differently in women and girls , as well as that it isn’t necessarily a condition that people grow out of as they age. Adults struggle with symptoms, too; increased awareness means that some of them are only now getting treatment for challenges they have lived with their entire lives.

In addition, Sultan told HuffPost that “the fast-paced, multitasking nature of today’s world, combined with the constant barrage of information and distractions from technology,” can “exacerbate underlying ADHD symptoms or bring them to light in ways that wouldn’t have been as apparent in the past.”

Whether people are only now experiencing symptoms of ADHD because of the way we operate in the world today or just now realizing that some of their past struggles could be attributed to ADHD, it’s true that more people are seeking an official diagnosis — and treatment.

Andrew Kahn , a psychologist and associate director at Understood.org, told HuffPost that he did a huge number of ADHD evaluations for adults during the pandemic. He believes that discussion of the topic on social media at the time led many people to think, “‘Could this be me? Is this something that I’m going through?’”

It’s important not to assume that a high number of diagnoses means that they’re incorrect ones.

“While the increasing prevalence of ADHD diagnoses might raise concerns about overdiagnosis, it’s important to recognize that many people who now receive a diagnosis truly need support. The demands of modern life can push individuals with borderline or mild symptoms over the threshold into clinically significant impairment,” Sultan said.

It’s certain that you know someone in your professional or personal life who has ADHD (whether they have disclosed this to you or not). We spoke with Sultan, Kahn and other advocates about things you should avoid saying to people who have ADHD and general misconceptions about the diagnosis.

1. ‘ADHD is a problem only kids have.’

“Historically, ADHD was often seen as a childhood disorder that people ‘grew out of,’” Sultan said. “We now understand that it can persist into adulthood.” This creates challenges for people in school, at their workplace, and in their home lives. Some couples have even found that undiagnosed ADHD was a major source of their marital strife.

2. ‘You’re too smart to have ADHD.’

It’s true that some (but not all) people with ADHD struggle academically, but this is a result of their executive functioning symptoms, not their intelligence. Executive functioning refers to the work our brain does “to plan, prioritize, manage time and regulate emotions,” Sultan said.

With effort (sometimes an enormous amount), people with ADHD may be able to surmount these executive functioning challenges and earn high grades in school and admission to competitive colleges. But that doesn’t mean it was easy.

Saying something like this “dismisses the lifelong struggle that someone with ADHD has had to go through in order to reach any of those achievements,” Jesse J. Anderson , creator of the Extra Focus newsletter and an ADHD advocate, told HuffPost. “Having ADHD doesn’t preclude you from taking on big challenges in life. It just means that it was likely much more difficult and a lot of the struggles were hidden behind the scenes.”

It’s worth repeating that there isn’t a correlation between ADHD and intelligence.

“People with ADHD have similar intellects to people who don’t,” Kahn said. “There is no evidence it has to do with lower IQ.”

3. ‘It’s an excuse to be lazy.’

Having ADHD can make task completion a struggle, but it doesn’t necessarily signal a lack of ability or motivation.

“Labeling someone with ADHD as lazy is hurtful and inaccurate,” Sultan said.

What looks like laziness, Kahn said, is actually someone “trying to cope with things that are hard. So avoidance, in this case, can be misinterpreted as laziness when it might actually be paralysis.” Kahn described this paralysis as a state of being stuck, which might appear to outsiders as a refusal to follow instruction or a lack of effort.

Using the word lazy “labels the difficulties that come with ADHD as some sort of moral failing, as if it’s a conscious choice,” Anderson said. “We desperately want to do the right thing, but there is a blocker that can make it feel nearly impossible to move into action.”

4. ‘Why can’t you just focus?’

With ADHD, the inability to focus doesn’t mean a lack of desire to do so.

“This comment implies that focusing is simply a matter of willpower, disregarding the neurological challenges that individuals with ADHD face. It can make the person feel judged, frustrated and misunderstood, as if their struggles are due to a lack of effort,” Sultan said.

5. ‘You seem fine to me.’

Given that the poster child for ADHD has been a hyperactive little boy, there are a lot of people — adults, girls — who don’t fit this stereotype.

“ADHD symptoms aren’t always visible. Many people with ADHD may mask their symptoms or manage them well at times, but that doesn’t mean they don’t struggle,” Sultan said.

6. ‘It’s not that big of a deal.’

“Saying that ADHD isn’t that serious” can be hurtful and offensive, Dani Donovan , author of “The Anti-Planner: How to Get Sh*t Done When You Don’t Feel Like It,” told HuffPost.

The consequences of living with ADHD can cause a huge amount of distress for children and adults, too. Anderson described his experience, saying: “It’s like you’re constantly being quizzed in a class despite never being taught the material, so every day is just another failure, and you never really understand why. People don’t see that you are actually just struggling to fit into what people want of you because your brain doesn’t work the same way as most other people.”

7. ‘You’re overreacting.’

No one likes being told this when they’re upset. In addition, Sultan pointed out that “emotional dysregulation is a common symptom of ADHD.”

“Dismissing someone’s emotional response can make them feel invalidated and ignored,” he said, adding that it can also “increase frustration and make them feel like their experiences don’t matter.”

8. ‘You don’t seem to have any problem focusing on video games/TV/your phone.’

Given that ADHD stands for attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder, you’d be forgiven for assuming that it means someone has a deficiency of attention. But the reality is more complicated.

“People with ADHD don’t actually have a deficit of attention,” Anderson said. “We have an abundance of attention, but it is dysregulated attention, which means it can be difficult to aim. Sometimes we even hyperfocus on things, a type of directed attention that’s so intense that we don’t notice other things around us, things like people calling our name, the passing of time, or that we haven’t had anything to eat or drink for hours.”

9. ‘You’re trying to be difficult.’

People who have ADHD aren’t behaving the way they do in order to bother you — their brains simply work differently. Donovan explained that people with ADHD are not trying to make you mad or interrupt you on purpose. A little patience and understanding, plus not taking things personally, can go a long way in your interactions with folks who have ADHD (and, really, everybody else).

10. ‘No, you’re supposed to do it this way.’

ADHD has its challenges, but one advantage it often brings is an out-of-the-box approach to problem solving. Some people with ADHD even refer to their nontraditional thinking as a superpower.

“While there may be something that most people would consider a ‘common sense’ approach, that’s often counter to how the ADHD brain works,” Anderson said. “Rather than judging the method, pay attention to the results. Because of this divergent thinking, people with ADHD are great at finding alternative (often better) ways of solving a problem.”

11. ‘Everyone has a little ADHD.’

Although it’s true that we all have behaviors that are potential signs of ADHD — like “ tossing ” or an unexpected laundry habit — the degree of intensity and duration is different for people with an ADHD diagnosis.

“We all have those human experiences in varying amounts and degrees,” Kahn said. “It’s when they last a longer period of time and prevent us from doing things we think we should be able to do, then that’s where the difference comes into play.”

12. ‘Have you tried using a to do list/planner?’

Organization can be a challenge for anyone, but for people with ADHD, the problem runs deeper.

“Suggesting that it’s a simple fix overlooks the difficulties in executive functioning that many people with ADHD face,” Sultan said.

Anderson recalled how something like this has happened to him before.

“When I spoke to my doctor about ADHD for the first time, he beckoned me over to his desk like he was about to show me some life-changing knowledge about ADHD that would change everything for me,” he said. “Instead, he just showed me the Outlook calendar on his laptop, as if using a calendar app was a brand new concept to me and was going to cure my ADHD.”

“I guarantee you that a person with ADHD has tried just about every single productivity trick you can think of,” he continued. “We know ‘what’ we should do, the problem is that ADHD makes it difficult to do what we know.”

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